Samstag, 16. Oktober 2010
Donnerstag, 14. Oktober 2010
LET ME OUT
This song depicts what made me love VK music. It couldn't be any better....
The wishes I've made were already too late
Before I knew I could do it
I'm already...broken
LET ME OUT
She's crying crying
She's crying crying
LET ME OUT
Never expected such emotion from Miyavi. He is a great artist indeed.
The wishes I've made were already too late
Before I knew I could do it
I'm already...broken
LET ME OUT
She's crying crying
She's crying crying
LET ME OUT
Never expected such emotion from Miyavi. He is a great artist indeed.
Freitag, 8. Oktober 2010
STOP
On Oct. 9th - upcoming saturday - Nazis will use our city as a platform to spread their hateful and humiliating messages. AGAIN.
AGAIN our state has failed to stop people that should have been stopped long time ago, just because the freedom of assembly counts more that millions of dead.
Stand up for your rights and gather at the Schuttberg and 12 o'clock.
AGAIN our state has failed to stop people that should have been stopped long time ago, just because the freedom of assembly counts more that millions of dead.
Stand up for your rights and gather at the Schuttberg and 12 o'clock.
Samstag, 25. September 2010
LOVE
Imagine...
A room, small space in comparision to the greatness of the earth...
Heat. Cool, if thinking of the fire's heat...
Noise. Screaming...shouting....yelling, crying, singing....such tiny sounds.
Yet so meaningfull.
A crowd, driven by energy..pure, sinful energy rushing through their bodies.
Flesh on flesh. Breathing. Heat.
Blood.
Rough passion....strong, sinful, endlessly pleasing...
Beauty.
Echoing sounds....music. Repeating the hate, the anger, the love, the fear, the willing to LIVE over and over again.
Screaming out your emotions
A glare out of hungry, shivery eyes, crashing into some other person's gloomy eyes.
Light it up.
Smile.
Jump.
motto
Look at me.
Just imagine
Goodbye
I love you.
A room, small space in comparision to the greatness of the earth...
Heat. Cool, if thinking of the fire's heat...
Noise. Screaming...shouting....yelling, crying, singing....such tiny sounds.
Yet so meaningfull.
A crowd, driven by energy..pure, sinful energy rushing through their bodies.
Flesh on flesh. Breathing. Heat.
Blood.
Rough passion....strong, sinful, endlessly pleasing...
Beauty.
Echoing sounds....music. Repeating the hate, the anger, the love, the fear, the willing to LIVE over and over again.
Screaming out your emotions
A glare out of hungry, shivery eyes, crashing into some other person's gloomy eyes.
Light it up.
Smile.
Jump.
motto
Look at me.
Just imagine
Goodbye
I love you.
Donnerstag, 23. September 2010
the day of all days
http://maniasixty-nine.livejournal.com/6207.html
This post actually says everything.
Last preparations have been made or are a bout to be made. A feeling starts to grow, and it's the optimistic feeling that somehow with a bit of luck everything we hope for will work out.
I can't wait anymore~♪
Just let me be...no dirty tricks.....
This post actually says everything.
Last preparations have been made or are a bout to be made. A feeling starts to grow, and it's the optimistic feeling that somehow with a bit of luck everything we hope for will work out.
I can't wait anymore~♪
Just let me be...no dirty tricks.....
Dienstag, 21. September 2010
Montag, 20. September 2010
set the third
Delicious!!!!!
Kanpai! We got Rena drunk a little, unfortunately not all the way....but her drunk self is interesting.
Ther's always a next time!
Coffee after a night of alcohol and sex games....
Can you see my reflection, Johnny?
What a wonderful sad and happy day that was.
setup le deuxieme
Wonderful and fascinating chalk landscapes.
big, a bit scary but yet beautiful and amazing.
two other amazing creatures:
"A decent meal!"
This morning's sunrise.
setup1 my birthday
My birthday table withh all ma loved goodies.
Isn't he just the utterly super cutes cat in the world?
Sonntag, 19. September 2010
Samstag, 18. September 2010
above the skies
Just noticed he's very, very beautiful. All those three are.
Seeing them calms me in some way.
But we should avoid getting carried away by our feelings in order to avoid regrettable situations.
What's far stays far and should stay far.
So I'll remain in silence.
De La Rasphyxier et de l'abîme des bêtes appelées "jalousie".
Je me taire.
Seeing them calms me in some way.
But we should avoid getting carried away by our feelings in order to avoid regrettable situations.
What's far stays far and should stay far.
So I'll remain in silence.
De La Rasphyxier et de l'abîme des bêtes appelées "jalousie".
Je me taire.
Freitag, 17. September 2010
Countdown
Damnit, I missed the flight.
You better be alright my dears, or I'll spank you cute asses when you arrive at Europe. You're probably landing right now aren't you?
It's wonderful to say, espcially coz it is true: See you soon.
You better be alright my dears, or I'll spank you cute asses when you arrive at Europe. You're probably landing right now aren't you?
It's wonderful to say, espcially coz it is true: See you soon.
Dienstag, 14. September 2010
new start
Still didnt write about the wedding...
Seems like this year is gonna be tough. So many new and strict rules...
After school I dropped my cigarette into a huge puddle of mud! I hadn't even lit it! Of course I couldnt save it...
When I got home I found a note of DHL in my letterbox, so I drove all the way to the post office at the station to pick up my new shoes. Maybe if I had read it properly, I had noticed the little word "tomorrow".....So I'll pick them up TOMORROW.
De La Rasphyxier est arrivée.
Seems like this year is gonna be tough. So many new and strict rules...
After school I dropped my cigarette into a huge puddle of mud! I hadn't even lit it! Of course I couldnt save it...
When I got home I found a note of DHL in my letterbox, so I drove all the way to the post office at the station to pick up my new shoes. Maybe if I had read it properly, I had noticed the little word "tomorrow".....So I'll pick them up TOMORROW.
De La Rasphyxier est arrivée.
Donnerstag, 9. September 2010
Mittwoch, 8. September 2010
9pm in germany, 9th of September in Japan, the number of today is 11.
Happy rocking aniversary, D'ESPAIRSRAY.
Stay as you are,
Keep what you have
And never stop going on.
You make us proud and prosperous, and we adore you and your work.
May all of your wishes come true, and may your music never stop making us feel blessed.
Until the ray of live runs out of time and fades away.
In supporting love
Nika
Happy rocking aniversary, D'ESPAIRSRAY.
Stay as you are,
Keep what you have
And never stop going on.
You make us proud and prosperous, and we adore you and your work.
May all of your wishes come true, and may your music never stop making us feel blessed.
Until the ray of live runs out of time and fades away.
In supporting love
Nika
What a horrible night, thank god it is over.
First I dreamed I had coloured my hair reddish-violetgreen, the I dreamed of having a baby in a borading home where all my old classmates and some rapists lived....
Hm, the baby wasn't horrible actually...
But then I dreamed of Rena and her mom and blue umbrellas turning into guitars and enemy soldiers gathering in our city...I had to become a soldier, too, but my parents wanted to get away from all that and hide somewhere in the mountains....
As I am writing this I just woke up - luckily, coz I still got 10 minutes to go till KS.
De La Rasphyxier et de l'amour interminable.
First I dreamed I had coloured my hair reddish-violetgreen, the I dreamed of having a baby in a borading home where all my old classmates and some rapists lived....
Hm, the baby wasn't horrible actually...
But then I dreamed of Rena and her mom and blue umbrellas turning into guitars and enemy soldiers gathering in our city...I had to become a soldier, too, but my parents wanted to get away from all that and hide somewhere in the mountains....
As I am writing this I just woke up - luckily, coz I still got 10 minutes to go till KS.
De La Rasphyxier et de l'amour interminable.
Dienstag, 7. September 2010
success
He liked it!
It still doesn't feel good to give away my drawings...I know I once said I'd never give any of those away again, but without this occasion I never would have drawn it....
Gotta shower really quick now!
It still doesn't feel good to give away my drawings...I know I once said I'd never give any of those away again, but without this occasion I never would have drawn it....
Gotta shower really quick now!
Montag, 6. September 2010
normal days
my parents returned yesterday and tomorrow's my father's birthday!
1. I eat again.
2. I planned to make a bookmark for the book i bought as my father's present, but yeah....it's become a bit to wide for being a book mark.
Took me about 4-5 hours...it was really hard. some party are blurred, i ran out of pencils, i got frustrated coz abstract drawings with my lines and points and shapes really isn't my thing, even though i love such pictures...
I started with some lead pencil drawings, but as soon as I used a black pencil for the final version, it got easier and actually made fun to add more and more deatils.
I hope he'll like it!
De La Rasphyxier et de la jeune fille ce que je suis encore á mon père. Joyeux Anniversaire.
1. I eat again.
2. I planned to make a bookmark for the book i bought as my father's present, but yeah....it's become a bit to wide for being a book mark.
Took me about 4-5 hours...it was really hard. some party are blurred, i ran out of pencils, i got frustrated coz abstract drawings with my lines and points and shapes really isn't my thing, even though i love such pictures...
I started with some lead pencil drawings, but as soon as I used a black pencil for the final version, it got easier and actually made fun to add more and more deatils.
I hope he'll like it!
De La Rasphyxier et de la jeune fille ce que je suis encore á mon père. Joyeux Anniversaire.
Sonntag, 5. September 2010
taiiii
got a horrible headache again...I feel so dizzy and lightheaded, I could be drunk.
Just repaired the slot in my pants, now it looks like a scar!
I could throw up any minute...
my stomach is a total mess. The pain comes...and it goes.....now it's gone. But it'll come back soon, I can already feel it...uh.
Maybe it's beacuse....I didn't eat for uh....14 hours. mh.
I'll get dressed and buy something to eat....
Just repaired the slot in my pants, now it looks like a scar!
I could throw up any minute...
my stomach is a total mess. The pain comes...and it goes.....now it's gone. But it'll come back soon, I can already feel it...uh.
Maybe it's beacuse....I didn't eat for uh....14 hours. mh.
I'll get dressed and buy something to eat....
Samstag, 4. September 2010
to the lightest
Why does somebody who wrote a text message just seconds ago not answer his phone?? Explain yourself, Darling!
Haha, some hip-hip boys wasting their lifetime at the McDonalds shouted "NEXT!!" when I passed! That was cute.
Hey. They own me a dollar! Damnit, I should have said that....
+
Bob's Magic in orange!! I just had to buy them, they're orange!!
Oh, and I just found out the litte five-yeard-old from next door had been spying on me. His father asked him to find our where and when and in what order I deliver my newspapers....ehm yeah. Just heard how he told him his results.
Oh, he's too cute.
Bleaching starts NOW!
Haha, some hip-hip boys wasting their lifetime at the McDonalds shouted "NEXT!!" when I passed! That was cute.
Hey. They own me a dollar! Damnit, I should have said that....
+Bob's Magic in orange!! I just had to buy them, they're orange!!
Oh, and I just found out the litte five-yeard-old from next door had been spying on me. His father asked him to find our where and when and in what order I deliver my newspapers....ehm yeah. Just heard how he told him his results.
Oh, he's too cute.
Bleaching starts NOW!
abgrund
I guess I'll do an "abyss" cover soon. Well not that soon, but maybe by the end of the year.
Gotta learn the lyrics by heart...get over a few rhythmical and japanese stressing problems...and get a feeling for the story behind the song, otherwise I won't be able to show feelings without loosing control.
I love this pic to death. Breakfast now, the work!
De La Rasphyxier
Gotta learn the lyrics by heart...get over a few rhythmical and japanese stressing problems...and get a feeling for the story behind the song, otherwise I won't be able to show feelings without loosing control.
I love this pic to death. Breakfast now, the work!
De La Rasphyxier
Freitag, 3. September 2010
moi lolita
wonderful was my last word before I started typing this entrey. but lemme begin:
went downtown to have a meal at mecces. who cares that I've got enough food here...i was just bored.
wanted to buy new razors and powder, but I hadn't enough money for the razor's so I just decided to be fine with the powder.
when I wanted to pay, the guy told me a different price. I said I didnt have that much money and turned to leave the market, be he shouted "just wait a sec, I'll let someone check it"
everybody heard it and everybody was watching. I got so pissed at that idiot. he made me run behind another woman who let me wait several minutes before she came to check the price again. I stood there like a complete idiot, and of course I had already seen that the real price tag wasn't exactly placed under the product, so I misunderstood it.
but that stupid market wanted to proove how good it cares for its customers, made me wait, stand around with nothing to and after all it was even more embarrassing coz I didnt have enough money with me for some 4€ cosmetics...
But since I've already decided never to buy make up at Müller's again....I gotta buy it somewhere, so I guess I'll stick with DM....
In the end I walked out of the market with never razors nor powder but evil intentions towards the vendor.
uh.
went downtown to have a meal at mecces. who cares that I've got enough food here...i was just bored.wanted to buy new razors and powder, but I hadn't enough money for the razor's so I just decided to be fine with the powder.
when I wanted to pay, the guy told me a different price. I said I didnt have that much money and turned to leave the market, be he shouted "just wait a sec, I'll let someone check it"
everybody heard it and everybody was watching. I got so pissed at that idiot. he made me run behind another woman who let me wait several minutes before she came to check the price again. I stood there like a complete idiot, and of course I had already seen that the real price tag wasn't exactly placed under the product, so I misunderstood it.
but that stupid market wanted to proove how good it cares for its customers, made me wait, stand around with nothing to and after all it was even more embarrassing coz I didnt have enough money with me for some 4€ cosmetics...
But since I've already decided never to buy make up at Müller's again....I gotta buy it somewhere, so I guess I'll stick with DM....
In the end I walked out of the market with never razors nor powder but evil intentions towards the vendor.
uh.
luife
no eierschaukeln today, I gotta work!
showering. feeding my animals. ripping my clothes. getting dressed. cemetery....uh....mino forest! :D
God people I turned 58....was it already 58? I don't know anmore!
my twink Vermeill collecting flowers at midnight... but shht, didn't tell anyone, he's a Rogwel! I just wanna see the other side of DIM, ya know.
showering. feeding my animals. ripping my clothes. getting dressed. cemetery....uh....mino forest! :D
God people I turned 58....was it already 58? I don't know anmore!
my twink Vermeill collecting flowers at midnight... but shht, didn't tell anyone, he's a Rogwel! I just wanna see the other side of DIM, ya know.
Mittwoch, 1. September 2010
davidoff
Day 3 of me being all on my own and I'm nearly starving.
due to my lazyness in cooking I went to the supermarket and bought some fastfood instead stuff....which demanded way more effort, getting dressed, walking, meeting people, spending money....but as I said I was too lazy to cook a tomatoe sauce.
Guess I won't make it to 60 before Sunday....but surely 58^^
yeah...enjoy yourselves, my meal is burning.
due to my lazyness in cooking I went to the supermarket and bought some fastfood instead stuff....which demanded way more effort, getting dressed, walking, meeting people, spending money....but as I said I was too lazy to cook a tomatoe sauce.
Guess I won't make it to 60 before Sunday....but surely 58^^
yeah...enjoy yourselves, my meal is burning.
Dienstag, 31. August 2010
ohayooou~
Half an hour after waking up I suddelny realized that I lost my mouthpiece while sleeping. It couldn't be seen anywhere on my bed, so I got scared I might have swallowed it...but it just lay underneath my blanket.
relief~
I dreamed of ZERO being a secretary at my parent's enterprise, smiling at me shyly....hee nice dream!
relief~
I dreamed of ZERO being a secretary at my parent's enterprise, smiling at me shyly....hee nice dream!
Sonntag, 29. August 2010
The moments I have been waiting for are over now. My room is full of silence and emptiness.
I hoped you would leave something, some notes like the times before...and then I found the post-its on my TV screen.
thank you for those...it was very cute...
I don't wanna forget the feelings you created. I can still remember how you stood behind me while I was at the computer...it's like I'd expect you to be there if I turned around.
For my own good I won't.
"yami no saki ni wa iro"
I hoped you would leave something, some notes like the times before...and then I found the post-its on my TV screen.
thank you for those...it was very cute...
I don't wanna forget the feelings you created. I can still remember how you stood behind me while I was at the computer...it's like I'd expect you to be there if I turned around.
For my own good I won't.
"yami no saki ni wa iro"
Dienstag, 24. August 2010
Montag, 23. August 2010
Sonntag, 22. August 2010
winner
yep! I just won the battleground 51+ all on my own.
No Rogs, no Elerds either, because they simply FORGOT that it was time! GHow can that happen?
I should have taken a screenshot of how I ran around over the whole area collecting cores with nobody trying to stop me...I was scared as hell that some Rog might show up out of sudden, but nothing happened.
It as a very calm session at the battleground!
When I old them later I had won, they were all like "Oh shit! Was it really time? Sorry, I forgot it...."
That's how to do it!
No Rogs, no Elerds either, because they simply FORGOT that it was time! GHow can that happen?
I should have taken a screenshot of how I ran around over the whole area collecting cores with nobody trying to stop me...I was scared as hell that some Rog might show up out of sudden, but nothing happened.
It as a very calm session at the battleground!
When I old them later I had won, they were all like "Oh shit! Was it really time? Sorry, I forgot it...."
That's how to do it!
kitten
this is it, the last 24 hours.
as we can see, even three months pass one day.
I gotta a lot to do until tomorrow...but first lunch!
as we can see, even three months pass one day.
I gotta a lot to do until tomorrow...but first lunch!
Samstag, 21. August 2010
trickster
"yeah, whatever". that's everything I can say to this.
how annyoing such smartasses are. arrogant wiseacres, not listening to other pple but themselves, pretending to know-it-all, never being wrong, never having to say sorry. alway getting what they want - what annoys me the most.
helping poor, stupid, clueless pipsqueaks by correct every single blooper...
Oh how much they have seen and achieved in their awesome lives, how much they will see and do in the very soon future....respecting other people's feelings? huh? why that?!
how GREAT the upper classes must feel. I'm sorry for being a little loser, I'm sorry for wasting your time with my unblessed being...
arrogant, bragging suckers, that's exactly what you are. I must have a very weak personality if I'm really hanging out with you.
get yourself somebody to fuck you properly before you piss me of again.
how annyoing such smartasses are. arrogant wiseacres, not listening to other pple but themselves, pretending to know-it-all, never being wrong, never having to say sorry. alway getting what they want - what annoys me the most.
helping poor, stupid, clueless pipsqueaks by correct every single blooper...
Oh how much they have seen and achieved in their awesome lives, how much they will see and do in the very soon future....respecting other people's feelings? huh? why that?!
how GREAT the upper classes must feel. I'm sorry for being a little loser, I'm sorry for wasting your time with my unblessed being...
arrogant, bragging suckers, that's exactly what you are. I must have a very weak personality if I'm really hanging out with you.
get yourself somebody to fuck you properly before you piss me of again.
Mittwoch, 18. August 2010
wedding
I love this blues dress.
Yeah, maybe I should've taken my underwear off ~
I wanted such a dress for dancing...but in my town you won't find such stuff which really annoys me....
Anygay, this is my suit for my cousin's wedding in September. I always wanted to have such kind of clothing yayyyy~
Annette's way to hide here cigarettes from her mother when she leaves the house - just put them in a Thomas Sabo box!
endless rain...fall on my heart...kokoro no kizuni...
let me forget....all of the hate, all of the sadness....
oh my dear hide.
I just shocked myself.
instead of an R for "dear" I just accidentally typed a D.
Fuck myself...
The last live is wonderful.
shopping2
Würzburg is a bloody ugly city, but it's got so many wonderful stores with beautiful dresses and gorgeous shoes....we spent about 500€ as far as I know lol
my slack suit was the least expensive....just about uh 100€ I don't really know...
Despite being ugly, Würzburg offers a huge amount of stylish people and sexy girls, chrm.
But damn, I could cry for those boots. Somebody give me 300€, please.
Dienstag, 17. August 2010
Montag, 16. August 2010
wake
Today I woke up with a roundly positive feeling.
The letter was a succes....the phonecall was success...
Oh, but I almost missed driving school this morning. Good thing my teacher called me right away.
Did a good job, I guess. I practised reverse parking for the first time, and it's not even that hard.
haru, netsu, aki to fuyu....
The letter was a succes....the phonecall was success...
Oh, but I almost missed driving school this morning. Good thing my teacher called me right away.
Did a good job, I guess. I practised reverse parking for the first time, and it's not even that hard.
haru, netsu, aki to fuyu....
Sonntag, 15. August 2010
haru, netsu, aki to fuyu......
believe it or not, Annette spent a few hours with me. She needed advice for an issue that didn't really surprise me to be honest....boys.
God. There's no one like her.
I hope I could help a bit.
I got the monopoly, fuckers!!
God. There's no one like her.
I hope I could help a bit.
I got the monopoly, fuckers!!
got it
Level 53 today! Guess I won't make it up to 80 in three weeks.
I kinda like Sido's rap sometimes. In my opinion he speaks the truth...sometimes.
Just watched a bit of the cartoon The Brave Little Toaster. It's utterly cute...especially the blanket and the toaster. They're gay.
Now I remember what I wanted to write earlier...today I watched Jessica Simpson's The Price of Beauty. It's actually wuite intersting. She went to japan to experience the different kinds of beauty, like Geishas or Harajuku styles. In the end they organized a fashion show where everybody could walk over the runway in his favourite style.
A man joined the spectacle and wore a gorgeous black coat with an extraordinary fur collar and black and shiny leather boots almost up to his knees with many silver buckles and about 7cm heels.
It may sound slutty but it did in no way, he looked absolutely perfect , it just fit him. Then Jessica said sth like "In Japan I understood that everybody has his own style and needs to find it, without caring what other people might say". I thought about that statement for a while and suddenly I got it.
That boots had been women's shoes.
It was like "Oh right, men don't wear heels". I had totally forgotten about that social stereotype. But it made me quite happy actually.
I'm so much into genderless fashion that I sometimes don't realize if men wear make up or skirts or heels...
I'm a good person. d^^b
I kinda like Sido's rap sometimes. In my opinion he speaks the truth...sometimes.
Just watched a bit of the cartoon The Brave Little Toaster. It's utterly cute...especially the blanket and the toaster. They're gay.
Now I remember what I wanted to write earlier...today I watched Jessica Simpson's The Price of Beauty. It's actually wuite intersting. She went to japan to experience the different kinds of beauty, like Geishas or Harajuku styles. In the end they organized a fashion show where everybody could walk over the runway in his favourite style.
A man joined the spectacle and wore a gorgeous black coat with an extraordinary fur collar and black and shiny leather boots almost up to his knees with many silver buckles and about 7cm heels.
It may sound slutty but it did in no way, he looked absolutely perfect , it just fit him. Then Jessica said sth like "In Japan I understood that everybody has his own style and needs to find it, without caring what other people might say". I thought about that statement for a while and suddenly I got it.
That boots had been women's shoes.
It was like "Oh right, men don't wear heels". I had totally forgotten about that social stereotype. But it made me quite happy actually.
I'm so much into genderless fashion that I sometimes don't realize if men wear make up or skirts or heels...
I'm a good person. d^^b
to screw or not screw
I guess I'm doing fine again.
Wanted to write something speacial...but I forgot what it was.
SwAT had been nice.
It's raining, so I'll have a day of gambling!
Wanted to write something speacial...but I forgot what it was.
SwAT had been nice.
It's raining, so I'll have a day of gambling!
Samstag, 14. August 2010
sign
I'm recovering slowly....but still without medicine!
Okay, maybe that doesn't count since I devoured half a package of neo-angin....
Okay, maybe that doesn't count since I devoured half a package of neo-angin....
Freitag, 13. August 2010
struck down
a heavy cold and a tonsillitis, a blocked nose, headaches, a sore throat, dizziness.
I feel drunk.
Any questions?
Perfect.
I feel drunk.
Any questions?
Perfect.
Donnerstag, 12. August 2010
just say tha word
tadashi
I guess I won't do a cosplay of him....Aiji has his shoes, Rebbi has his pants, I have his hair and glasses.....
That's annoying.
That's annoying.
Mittwoch, 11. August 2010
dont fuck with us
Is this man kidding me?
does he think it's funny or what?
Ruki—The 4 of us haven’t changed, you know.
...
Ruki—We haven’t changed, but we feel sort of tired (laughs). Even if the members get together, we don’t make as much noise as we used to in the past (laughs).
...
Ruki—No, I’m not noisy, but I feel we no longer fool around as much as we used to do in the past.
Aoi—Ah, that explosiveness has gone, right? (laughs)
Ruki—Even the memory has gone (laughs).
...
Ruki-If we start talking about band stuff the build-up just slows down (laughs). For example, if we get talking about soccer or games, we go “Oh~yeah!”, but if it gets to “What about the songs?”, we’re all, “Hm~”.
what the fuck.
Reita-In the past, Kai was the one who used to give us the laughs, you know. Sending weird picture-mails, and stuff (laughs). But these days, not that much.
Kai—I almost wonder whether or not it happened even once in the entire year, me making everybody laugh.
Ruki—You probably did try to make us laugh, but ended up irritating us instead (laughs).
Why are they still laughing? there's nothing funny about this conversation.
Let's see what dear Aoi thinks about his friendship with the other gazemembers:
Aoi—Well, we don’t talk about the finer details, you know. Just to the extent of answering if asked.
Good to hear.
--------For example, if there’s someone in really low spirits, or is clearly not feeling well, what sort of a band is the GazettE in response to such a situation?
Ruki—Hm. We just get left behind, isn’t it? (laughs)
The next thing really freaks me out. They repeat everything the fans say about Kai and still laugh liek it was a joke.
Starting with Kai?
Reita—(Kai is) tired, isn’t it?
--------Is that grief floating about?
Ruki—It’s not grief, you know. It’s despair (laughs). Like falling down to the depths.
Kai—Well, I, sort of, don’t talk much these days, do I?
Ruki—Not being there even for the recording, etc.
Uruha—He’s not well.
Kai—No, I’m fine.
Uruha—And, his lips are gradually turning purple (laughs).
Aoi—Even though he says he isn’t unwell.
Reita—His eyes look dead (laughs).
Yes damnit, he looks dead.
Next, they talk about Reita for a while. In a very derogatory way, if you ask me.
Then they state they cant talk about Ruki's changes coz he either hasnt changed or his changes are too private.
But then comes this:
Uruha—Talking of things that have changed, he’s no longer as amiable as he used to be, you know.
Next is Aoi:
Reita—He stopped giving us cigarettes on birthdays (laughs).
Uruha—He stopped sending mails on birthdays (laughs).
...
Aoi—I guess I just got tired.
I'll stop here. The interview still continues for a while, but I guess I made my point.
Yeah...Nothing new, nothing we didnt expect or already know. Uruha was the only one being at least a bit of the Uruha I used to know.
And I feel wonderful right now....what I read would have hurt me as hell three months ago, but not now. Frankly, I dont give a fuck on this. And it feels wonderful.
does he think it's funny or what?
Ruki—The 4 of us haven’t changed, you know.
...
Ruki—We haven’t changed, but we feel sort of tired (laughs). Even if the members get together, we don’t make as much noise as we used to in the past (laughs).
...
Ruki—No, I’m not noisy, but I feel we no longer fool around as much as we used to do in the past.
Aoi—Ah, that explosiveness has gone, right? (laughs)
Ruki—Even the memory has gone (laughs).
...
Ruki-If we start talking about band stuff the build-up just slows down (laughs). For example, if we get talking about soccer or games, we go “Oh~yeah!”, but if it gets to “What about the songs?”, we’re all, “Hm~”.
what the fuck.
Reita-In the past, Kai was the one who used to give us the laughs, you know. Sending weird picture-mails, and stuff (laughs). But these days, not that much.
Kai—I almost wonder whether or not it happened even once in the entire year, me making everybody laugh.
Ruki—You probably did try to make us laugh, but ended up irritating us instead (laughs).
Why are they still laughing? there's nothing funny about this conversation.
Let's see what dear Aoi thinks about his friendship with the other gazemembers:
Aoi—Well, we don’t talk about the finer details, you know. Just to the extent of answering if asked.
Good to hear.
--------For example, if there’s someone in really low spirits, or is clearly not feeling well, what sort of a band is the GazettE in response to such a situation?
Ruki—Hm. We just get left behind, isn’t it? (laughs)
The next thing really freaks me out. They repeat everything the fans say about Kai and still laugh liek it was a joke.
Starting with Kai?
Reita—(Kai is) tired, isn’t it?
--------Is that grief floating about?
Ruki—It’s not grief, you know. It’s despair (laughs). Like falling down to the depths.
Kai—Well, I, sort of, don’t talk much these days, do I?
Ruki—Not being there even for the recording, etc.
Uruha—He’s not well.
Kai—No, I’m fine.
Uruha—And, his lips are gradually turning purple (laughs).
Aoi—Even though he says he isn’t unwell.
Reita—His eyes look dead (laughs).
Yes damnit, he looks dead.
Next, they talk about Reita for a while. In a very derogatory way, if you ask me.
Then they state they cant talk about Ruki's changes coz he either hasnt changed or his changes are too private.
But then comes this:
Uruha—Talking of things that have changed, he’s no longer as amiable as he used to be, you know.
Next is Aoi:
Reita—He stopped giving us cigarettes on birthdays (laughs).
Uruha—He stopped sending mails on birthdays (laughs).
...
Aoi—I guess I just got tired.
I'll stop here. The interview still continues for a while, but I guess I made my point.
Yeah...Nothing new, nothing we didnt expect or already know. Uruha was the only one being at least a bit of the Uruha I used to know.
And I feel wonderful right now....what I read would have hurt me as hell three months ago, but not now. Frankly, I dont give a fuck on this. And it feels wonderful.
Dienstag, 10. August 2010
august 7 ALBAN PARK
Besides from the entrance fee of 5€ it was okay.
The wine was good, a bit too good for me, but anyways...
It's over and I feel like human again.
(Thank God.)
But huskie, that really wasnt necessary.
Anyways. Unknown drunk guy, thanks for your company and the loosey!
Of course I met my exboyfriend Micha ( and his new girlfriend. She's very very sweet, sadly they had to go early...). He's as stupid and funny as always. And he's always there when I need someone for a serious conversation. An evening with him can't ever be boring.
But he's THIN, he really is.
The next pics were made during SORROW GATE - they were amazing. Thanks to their ages I felt like being on a ACDC gig, but anyways......as you can see I was too drunk to hold the camera properly.
Since I was headbanging right next to their guitarist, my ears were totally destroyed afterwards.....my neck still hasnt recovered.
Gotta stop here! Had no breakfast, so I'm very hungry right now!
ENNELL
someday
Just my recent stuff....
My new hairstyling product and the AMAZING hairstyles you can create with it.
Oh, and my beautiful new scarf.
Reminds me of DEAD TREE or THE MARROW OF A BONE.
I love it.
My new hairstyling product and the AMAZING hairstyles you can create with it.
Oh, and my beautiful new scarf.
Reminds me of DEAD TREE or THE MARROW OF A BONE.
I love it.
august 5
I totally forgot about my date with Aiji!
I was enjoying lunch, still in my sleeping clothes, and suddenly she stood in front of my door....
I enjoyed seeing her in pain, hehe~
Industrial!!
I promised her to get my tongue pierced together with her next year.
I just notcied every line starts with an I....
Interesting.
INNELL
august 3
I stayed at Nina's for an evening of wok-cooking and fun...
we slept in the upper apartment. it looked like it had been built in the 70's by a bunch of young people who wanted a place to party......that communism sign was funny, hanging around in such an old flat. really oldschool.
Rena gave me a gift. A crisp looking like a fish.
We were too tired to play such a complicated game.... 3am!!
Laura hit the board twice and destroyed everything.
we slept in the upper apartment. it looked like it had been built in the 70's by a bunch of young people who wanted a place to party......that communism sign was funny, hanging around in such an old flat. really oldschool.
Rena gave me a gift. A crisp looking like a fish.
We were too tired to play such a complicated game.... 3am!!
Laura hit the board twice and destroyed everything.
dental
date with my dentist again!
Suddenly a girl stepped in and smiled at me. I had the strange feeling of knowing her from school....
I didnt get who she was until she came back and asked "So how's driving school going?"
Jana! It's you!
I'm extremely tired.....my darling didnt let me hear anything from her. I guess I have to call her today and show her who wears the pants here!!~
I still didnt uload the latest pics...shall I?
Suddenly a girl stepped in and smiled at me. I had the strange feeling of knowing her from school....
I didnt get who she was until she came back and asked "So how's driving school going?"
Jana! It's you!
I'm extremely tired.....my darling didnt let me hear anything from her. I guess I have to call her today and show her who wears the pants here!!~
I still didnt uload the latest pics...shall I?
Montag, 9. August 2010
order&driving
so Domi helped me getting things in order. He's too sweet for this world...
He picked me up at home, drove back to his house, put my bike in his trunk, drove it back home and then helped me getting my Darling's birthday present.
And brought me home again!
I tried to get my headset from Nina, but she wasn't at home...so I put a note in her letterbox. Hoepfully she'll find it.
Now I'm enjoying my spaghetti icecream.
ROCKOOOON!
ENNELL
He picked me up at home, drove back to his house, put my bike in his trunk, drove it back home and then helped me getting my Darling's birthday present.
And brought me home again!
I tried to get my headset from Nina, but she wasn't at home...so I put a note in her letterbox. Hoepfully she'll find it.
Now I'm enjoying my spaghetti icecream.
ROCKOOOON!
ENNELL
Sonntag, 8. August 2010
kioku
my memory of last night just came back.
thanks to all the sweet people who stayed at my side and whose help I didnt deserve.
you surely had a hard time beacuse of me....
but I never wanna be this drunk again. loosing my self control was horrible.
I better not try to remember more.
thanks to all the sweet people who stayed at my side and whose help I didnt deserve.
you surely had a hard time beacuse of me....
but I never wanna be this drunk again. loosing my self control was horrible.
I better not try to remember more.
jäägermeister
I feel like shit....everything hurts, I'm dizzy, my head hurts....I dont wanna throw up again....
Samstag, 7. August 2010
knocked over
like a punch in the face.
wtf? he's in love with me?
oh why T__T
I'm quite helpless now.
Baby! Answer your phone!!!
wtf? he's in love with me?
oh why T__T
I'm quite helpless now.
Baby! Answer your phone!!!
regret
I forgot about the alban park festival today and now I coudlnt make it anymore....Damn it!!!
The whole L8 crew is rocking their ass off...fuck. why didn't I hurry a bit when I had the chance?
The whole L8 crew is rocking their ass off...fuck. why didn't I hurry a bit when I had the chance?
Mittwoch, 4. August 2010
I miss the times when I didn't care about superficial things like....
Everday.
Can I learn how to be liveless again?
A prayer, a wish, up to the sky...
Moon, light up the darkness.
I can't even see the stardust.
Sleepless.
I sleep....the dream won't stop.
I'd like to believe it for now.
So live, cherish this wound, until the ray of live runs out of time and fades away.
These words burned into my flesh would be release.
One day I'll run as far away from all this as possible, until my feet won't take my body a single step further. I won't return, I give a fuck about all this.
What's done to me is ridiculous, and I'd crack up if it wasn't my own live being this ridiculous.
I wanna sleep.
Everday.
Can I learn how to be liveless again?
A prayer, a wish, up to the sky...
Moon, light up the darkness.
I can't even see the stardust.
Sleepless.
I sleep....the dream won't stop.
I'd like to believe it for now.
So live, cherish this wound, until the ray of live runs out of time and fades away.
These words burned into my flesh would be release.
One day I'll run as far away from all this as possible, until my feet won't take my body a single step further. I won't return, I give a fuck about all this.
What's done to me is ridiculous, and I'd crack up if it wasn't my own live being this ridiculous.
I wanna sleep.
cleaning
things turned out differently alst night. I couldnt go home coz nobody joined me, so i slept on a matress in all my clothes, with makeup and hair done....from 3am to 9am....again just six hours!
I had to get up early coz of an appointedment with my dentist.
Whoo, in ten minutes I'll be allowed to eat again!!
Max is a perverted bitch. His boyfriend is 25 and lives in NRW! We made jokes about how funny it would be to pick up my girlfriend and his boyfriend if they were travelling on the same train one day. The people around us would see a girl and a guy waiting, a girl and a guy leaving the train, walking straight to the other two members....and kissing the same gender as couples do. Then we'd walk off hands in hands and laugh our asses off.
That's my wish. I really wanna do that...their faces would be priceless!
ENNELL
I had to get up early coz of an appointedment with my dentist.
Whoo, in ten minutes I'll be allowed to eat again!!
Max is a perverted bitch. His boyfriend is 25 and lives in NRW! We made jokes about how funny it would be to pick up my girlfriend and his boyfriend if they were travelling on the same train one day. The people around us would see a girl and a guy waiting, a girl and a guy leaving the train, walking straight to the other two members....and kissing the same gender as couples do. Then we'd walk off hands in hands and laugh our asses off.
That's my wish. I really wanna do that...their faces would be priceless!
ENNELL
Montag, 2. August 2010
creeper
I just had the fucking creepiest experience ever....
Whil I was talking to Nina on the phone, I looked sth up in my calendar. When I had found it, I closed my notes and out of nothing I had the strong feeling of a hand grabbing my elbow...I hontestly felt it!!
Maybe I'm going insane....
ENNELL
Whil I was talking to Nina on the phone, I looked sth up in my calendar. When I had found it, I closed my notes and out of nothing I had the strong feeling of a hand grabbing my elbow...I hontestly felt it!!
Maybe I'm going insane....
ENNELL
Sonntag, 1. August 2010
Happy late birthday, Mr. EROS!!
Since my entry got deleted yesterday while I was still writing....
Happy birthday and so on, I'm too tired for enthusiasm, sorry...
Tell your mom thanks for giving birth to you, say thanks to your daddy...and the truck driver for not completely killing you...thanks to Karyu and Dieur Mind's drummer...thanks to the newspaper man for printing Hizumi's ad....
God made something right finally.
I wish you the best for your future, that's what you deserve. We love you, Monsterman.
I drank like a fish for you at the L8.
ENNELL
Happy birthday and so on, I'm too tired for enthusiasm, sorry...
Tell your mom thanks for giving birth to you, say thanks to your daddy...and the truck driver for not completely killing you...thanks to Karyu and Dieur Mind's drummer...thanks to the newspaper man for printing Hizumi's ad....
God made something right finally.
I wish you the best for your future, that's what you deserve. We love you, Monsterman.
I drank like a fish for you at the L8.
ENNELL
Freitag, 30. Juli 2010
goooooooooooooruuuuuu
From today on, I have my middle school graduation !! Finally!!!
Maths, biology, chemistry, physics - the nature subjects to say so: 4, the whole lot! Just as I expected.
Scored 3 at German, sucks...but I didnt study or practise at all and didnt write my exams as I was supposed to do...
English 2, French 3 - damn cocksuckers couldnt it have been a little bit better?! So close to 1 and 2 this time!!
Art 1, the rest 2. Anyways.
SUCCESS!!!!!
Maths, biology, chemistry, physics - the nature subjects to say so: 4, the whole lot! Just as I expected.
Scored 3 at German, sucks...but I didnt study or practise at all and didnt write my exams as I was supposed to do...
English 2, French 3 - damn cocksuckers couldnt it have been a little bit better?! So close to 1 and 2 this time!!
Art 1, the rest 2. Anyways.
SUCCESS!!!!!
Donnerstag, 29. Juli 2010
itaiii#2
Vera almost broke my fingers during PE coz she hit the ball so fuckin hard! Gosh it hurts!!
Another girl knocked me over when she threw the ball right in my face...But since I was the Joker I had to protect the others and get all the punches...and we still lost 3:1 lol.
Had a nice shower, now I'm enjoying my free time and my icecream!
ENNELL
Mittwoch, 28. Juli 2010
technical shit.
what the hell did the Nokia guys think of when they invented 5230.....
I can't delete single pictures but they remain as grey pics, popping up notes like "cant be deleted" all the time....
I cant open my pics in a row when I open the data on my pc! I gotta open every single pic first, close it, open the next one...and then I can open them one after another like it's usually done on a pc.
data that's not on my monile anymore appears in the text message sounds list while songs I want to use a sms tones don't appear in that list even though they ARE on my mobile....wtf?
I cant change the sound of my alarm clock, there's the same rininging all the time...
it's not that I don't know how to use that mobile, but it's just construed in a very unsual way and I gotta admit I wouldnt have bought if I knew all of that...oh, the cam sucks.
But I shouldnt complain, at least it works...
I can't delete single pictures but they remain as grey pics, popping up notes like "cant be deleted" all the time....
I cant open my pics in a row when I open the data on my pc! I gotta open every single pic first, close it, open the next one...and then I can open them one after another like it's usually done on a pc.
data that's not on my monile anymore appears in the text message sounds list while songs I want to use a sms tones don't appear in that list even though they ARE on my mobile....wtf?
I cant change the sound of my alarm clock, there's the same rininging all the time...
it's not that I don't know how to use that mobile, but it's just construed in a very unsual way and I gotta admit I wouldnt have bought if I knew all of that...oh, the cam sucks.
But I shouldnt complain, at least it works...
kaeru....
So i'm bacl home afetr 2 and a half days wothout mobile and internet....it was okay - I won't start complaining about some girls or my roommates, the food was okay, the room was okay, we smoked as hell - well I didn't even need half a pack, but my roommate and her two frioends smoked 4 packs I guess.
Anyways. Thanks for stealing my heart with Abyss, D'espairsRay, and with Kaeranu Hito, MUCC. Didn't stop liostzening to that one....
The loneliness was too awesome. Once I wandered through the forest - gosh, words are not enough to describe the basic beauty of these trees - and for about 20 minutes, I was free. For these 20 minutes nobody in this world neither knew I was gone nor where I went. I was absolutely free.
It was hard without my Darling....being pissed all day and not even having the chance to talk to her for a minute made me mad.
ENNELL
Anyways. Thanks for stealing my heart with Abyss, D'espairsRay, and with Kaeranu Hito, MUCC. Didn't stop liostzening to that one....
The loneliness was too awesome. Once I wandered through the forest - gosh, words are not enough to describe the basic beauty of these trees - and for about 20 minutes, I was free. For these 20 minutes nobody in this world neither knew I was gone nor where I went. I was absolutely free.
It was hard without my Darling....being pissed all day and not even having the chance to talk to her for a minute made me mad.
ENNELL
Sonntag, 25. Juli 2010
san...san, san, zero-san
three more days until the MONSTER's gonna be released from its chains! wonder what it will be like...
oh! 28th, that's the day I'm returning from sambachshof. Travelling there with my class to attend a political education program. will be very important for our graduation, so I'm curious what we'll learn there!
class trips are most often fun, expecially the ones that last longer than one day.
Our teacher told us: "There might be american soldiers or other classes....Absolutely no sexual contact with no one!!"
Downloaded a few albums of Merry and MUCC today and had a great day off with gambling and....water and cookies.
My mummy's cooking right now, hehe.
See you on Wednesday!
...and don't forget the fries!!
ENNELL
oh! 28th, that's the day I'm returning from sambachshof. Travelling there with my class to attend a political education program. will be very important for our graduation, so I'm curious what we'll learn there!
class trips are most often fun, expecially the ones that last longer than one day.
Our teacher told us: "There might be american soldiers or other classes....Absolutely no sexual contact with no one!!"
Downloaded a few albums of Merry and MUCC today and had a great day off with gambling and....water and cookies.
My mummy's cooking right now, hehe.
See you on Wednesday!
...and don't forget the fries!!
ENNELL
Mittwoch, 21. Juli 2010
let's end it here.
I'm just fucked....AGAIN.....
Confusion and something between Before I Decay and Discharge, that's what it sounds like. I'm not in the mood to listen to it properly....but it seems okay.
I never liked Ruki growling in this insane way, he never was very good at it.
I'll fuck theses guys anyways for their selfishness. Dunno how to call it.
Bought a sweater yesterday. 20 bucks. Wanted to have it printed with the DISORDER font.
"yeah, we can do it, but it will be a horrible work and it will cost at least 50 bucks."
now I know that one of the DISORDER sweaters cost around 200 bucks. plus pants, shoes, shirts, tops, hats, jewelery, probably underwear.
fuck gazette.
Now I realize how ridiculouse Reita's noseband looks.
There is no personal Top 3 for me anymore.
There's D'espairsRay and Dir en Grey.
And nothing else.
ENNELL
Confusion and something between Before I Decay and Discharge, that's what it sounds like. I'm not in the mood to listen to it properly....but it seems okay.
I never liked Ruki growling in this insane way, he never was very good at it.
I'll fuck theses guys anyways for their selfishness. Dunno how to call it.
Bought a sweater yesterday. 20 bucks. Wanted to have it printed with the DISORDER font.
"yeah, we can do it, but it will be a horrible work and it will cost at least 50 bucks."
now I know that one of the DISORDER sweaters cost around 200 bucks. plus pants, shoes, shirts, tops, hats, jewelery, probably underwear.
fuck gazette.
Now I realize how ridiculouse Reita's noseband looks.
There is no personal Top 3 for me anymore.
There's D'espairsRay and Dir en Grey.
And nothing else.
ENNELL
Montag, 19. Juli 2010
mayfly
shock of my live
I wore a black dress today and had my lighter in the front pocket. When I took the dress off at home, I suddenly heard a nasty bang and felt something cold at my right foot. Red plastic stuff flew around, my ears started ringing from the loud echo of my bathroom and I realized my lighter had exploded.
I jumped to the sink to wash my foot, can't tell if I imagined the pain in my shock or if it was real. I couldn't breath anymore because the air was filled with gas, so I ran out of my bathroom and waited until I could breath again.
Surprisingly my dress wasn't even wet a bit...I guess liquid gas becomes gaseos when in contact with oxydgen...
Anyways I washed my dress in the sink and now it should be okay again...
Don't ask me how that could happen, I'm clueless!
It reminds me of last summer when I smashed an almost empty lighter against a wall to make it explode. The pieces of plastic flew so high, it took almost three seconds until I heard them fall down again....
I'm still in shock!!
ENNELL
I jumped to the sink to wash my foot, can't tell if I imagined the pain in my shock or if it was real. I couldn't breath anymore because the air was filled with gas, so I ran out of my bathroom and waited until I could breath again.
Surprisingly my dress wasn't even wet a bit...I guess liquid gas becomes gaseos when in contact with oxydgen...
Anyways I washed my dress in the sink and now it should be okay again...
Don't ask me how that could happen, I'm clueless!
It reminds me of last summer when I smashed an almost empty lighter against a wall to make it explode. The pieces of plastic flew so high, it took almost three seconds until I heard them fall down again....
I'm still in shock!!
ENNELL
Sonntag, 18. Juli 2010
zenko - time passes
My last update was on thursday, can you believe it?
I can't!
I'd like to apologize for the trouble and worries I have caused last week. The people this apology goes to don't need to be named since I guess they know they're meant.
Today, I have only two things in mind.
Both are unbelievably far away from, almost unreachable for me.
My Darling, you will be as close as possible to me this summer. Knwowing that somewhere in the furture and in present a Somebody is waiting for me and caring about me, gives me strenght. I have a little bit of you everyday and some rare times even more. I'll wait for the day I can truely be yours again.
And the second person I love with everything my heart has to give, who doesn't even know of my existence, who doesn't even care about my existence, is even further afar, living in complete different universe, unreachable for 364 days a year.
On Sep 24th I will be close to him for a few moments, watching and loving him in silence and unseen, and it will be everything I will ever achieve, and I am truely thankful for this chance.
In my everyday life I am torn between the slightly touchable and the absolutely unreachable Somebody, I have them both and mostly only one and when I go to sleep, none.
How much I wished my days to be different, at least for some light and valuable moments.
ENNELL
I can't!
I'd like to apologize for the trouble and worries I have caused last week. The people this apology goes to don't need to be named since I guess they know they're meant.
Today, I have only two things in mind.
Both are unbelievably far away from, almost unreachable for me.
My Darling, you will be as close as possible to me this summer. Knwowing that somewhere in the furture and in present a Somebody is waiting for me and caring about me, gives me strenght. I have a little bit of you everyday and some rare times even more. I'll wait for the day I can truely be yours again.
And the second person I love with everything my heart has to give, who doesn't even know of my existence, who doesn't even care about my existence, is even further afar, living in complete different universe, unreachable for 364 days a year.
On Sep 24th I will be close to him for a few moments, watching and loving him in silence and unseen, and it will be everything I will ever achieve, and I am truely thankful for this chance.
In my everyday life I am torn between the slightly touchable and the absolutely unreachable Somebody, I have them both and mostly only one and when I go to sleep, none.
How much I wished my days to be different, at least for some light and valuable moments.
ENNELL
Abonnieren
Kommentare (Atom)
